(via WeHeartIt)/
There are times where I feel the slightest animosity toward me. Not evident and aggressive but an ever so slight passive aggressive animosity. I am not sure where it stems from but I get the feeling that some people expect more from me.
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Some things I expect people to know about me. I am upfront and I do not apologize for them at all. In fact, I make a direct action of not apologizing for them.
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I am a writer. I am a, perhaps somewhat amateur, photographer. I love fashion. And, yes, I have a Marilyn Manson tattoo. I don't regret it. I don't regret anything I chose to like.
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I have recently been feeling as if I need a better life plan. Yes, I'm only 19 but time ticks on rather quickly these days. Perhaps writing and photographing won't pay my bills. Perhaps all of the things I am deeply passionate about are really worthless in the day-to-day life. Perhaps I should do something more logical that can give me a job that pays the bills.
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Well, I've decided I'm not thinking about that anymore. I am making a grand gesture, a leap of faith in myself. I am going to devote my entire life to what makes me passionate. Even if that means I will never get the recognition I crave. Even if it means living in near poverty for my entire life. I will be one of those people who can honestly say they love what they do. I will be able to say I have no regrets.
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I refuse to be one of those people that had such big dreams and sincere optimism about the future only to end up shuffling papers around on a desk at a 9-5 job. I refuse to become another pointless turn of the cog of society because I believe I can be more than that.
I don't expect fame. I don't expect much. I just want to be able to say I spent my life in a worthwhile and creative manner. I want to be able to say I am happy. I doubt I will ever be able to say that if I am not doing what I love most.
